Balls and All’s Highlight Reel

For those of you who don't know, Hashers can play kickball too.  Here is the highlight reel from Sunday's game:  "Balls and All" (our team) vs. TBD.

Team Captain Gets Off Easy took the field with sleeves rolled up in typical “intimidator” style.  She came to play, only to be disappointed that her team had already won, team TBD didn’t have enough girls to qualify.

Rodeo F*ck’s pitching was excellent, but a rock (or some other object invisible to the naked eye) kept forcing his pitches off to the left of the plate and into ball territory.

Welvin from TBD while on 3^rd tried to inspire the kicker with a rallying cry “C’mon Phil, no whammies, big money,” to no avail, Phil fouled out to end the inning and Welvin never did make it home.

Lactose Tolerant played shortstop and in an unprecedented move caught the ball and ran to personally tag out the runner on the first base line. 

TBD kicked a foul ball while Metro Ho was on first.  Chris threw the ball to tag her out and hit her in the head.  Metro Ho then admirably tried (and unfortunately failed) to argue herself to second.  (There is a no head shot rule, but it didn't count because it was a foul ball.)

We’ve Got a Bleeder was having a hard time kicking the ball outside of foul territory.  Lon, the referee told him “You aren’t factoring in the Earth’s rotation.”  Bleeder made base on the very next kick, thanks to Lon, (and some tricky calculations.)

Balls and All traveled with their own fans this game, KP and Anal.  Anal came with CoaCoaS and KP rolled up in his jeep (top down), unfolded a camp hammock and got in some rays.  His only complaint was that there weren’t any hot dogs or sodas offered.  Bleeder suggested that he should open a stand for the next game. 

I’d Rather ran from 2^nd to 3^rd and while trying to take 3^rd base and dodge the ball at the same time, performed a move now known as the “Sister F*cker.”  This move involves running from 2^nd to 3^rd hunched over like you are running for the helicopters on M*A*S*H* and then turning and sliding with your leg out to tag 3^rd base. 

CoaCoaS scored a run and couldn’t stop running, after all, it was his first run scored in a kickball game in 23 years.

While playing right field Just Marc (who registered 20 minutes before the game in typical Just Marc style) was surprised by a kick to deep right field from Adam.  He found himself sprinting with arms outstretched like a cross between Frankenstein’s monster and the Flash.  He got the ball and threw it just in time to keep the runner from taking home.

Balls and All won the game 9-3 (forfeits?  We don’t need no stinking forfeits) and declared that Metro Ho and Roofie tied for MVP.  They had showed up despite having a very late night on Saturday, (at Fagnostic’s party) and without them the game would have been a double forfeit.

Comments

[Late NIte Drive Thru]

sounds like y'all had fun...too bad kickball doesn't have enough action to keep me interested

[Ms Meh]

KP stole the hammock from me after I had to go to the Jeep and get my Leatherman to trim his toenail, which was cracked due to a full-contact-hug from Certified. What a distraction!

[Boozie]

Do you know that the jell-o shooters from Fagnostic's party were made with everclear? I had 5. So sue me for not being at the game.

[FPTGH]

Don't I get a shout-out for making it to the bar afterwards? I was at Fagnostic's party too!

[Capt'n S.A. Ho]

Yeah, there's still the matter of the out of court settlement to be handled for my pain and suffering of my toe!
shall we say 30 minutes after i put my doors on?
;)~

[notvodka]

KP, I think you are about to receive a really good blow.... to your ego. ;)

[Weeeeee!]

So what do I get for your bed frame almost breaking MY toe, Capt'n? ;)