"It is quite a simple hypothesis really," claims atmospheric researcher Kevin Wilt, "prayers have to use some medium of transmission." Wilt claims that since we are not actually shouting our prayers up to the sky, if God exists, he must be using some other means of detecting what it is specifically we are praying for. "We know that the body emits electromagnetic energy in the infrared, or heat." Wilt reasons that since this is perhaps the only medium by which potential information other than sound leave the body, God's hearing of our prayers must actually be a complex decoding of our heat signature.
"We also know that the presence of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere traps heat in the Earth's atmosphere," he goes on, "from there it is fairly simple to deduce that CO2 might actually be blinding God's "prayer detection" abilities."
Wilt plans to do some research on whether or not carbon dioxide can actually cause what he refers to as "prayer scattering." "If this hypothesis pans out, it is possible that someone praying to God in the midwest could actually have their prayer received by Vishnu."
That's why god couldn't hear me crying for a better life (job, money, romance. . . ). Shit, I thought he was just ignoring me. . .
Posted by: Aja | March 18, 2008 at 01:39 AM